Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Conflict - Discord of action, feeling, or effect
Poll: If you are really upset over something someone did, do you..1) Express it, but risk sounding emotional and petty?
2) Try to put it across really nicely, but have the other person think it didn't really bother you and thus not showing much care about it?
3) Resolve it in your heart and never say it
I think I tried all ways. Seems like everyway is wrong.
I am not normally the sort that is very temperamental or flares up in anger easily, so I see myself as reasonably reasonable. I hope I am right about myself. STILL, I find there's a problem when I communicate how I really feel, it's like, once you choose to do it, the other party is bound to feel bad/take it personally/feel incriminated ANYWAY.
Maybe when telling someone something unpleasant, no matter how nicely it is put, it's bound to "ouch".
In theory, it is advisible to communicate your feelings. But in practical, not everyone can handle it... myself included.
I am tempted to take the safe extreme, ie. 4) that is to not be so in touch with how I feel. In theory, that too is "wrong" because it is not healthy, it's not being "real with yourself", it's "suppression". My good brother Kianseh, who knew the old me, will roll his eyes if he ever know I reverted to my old self.
The paradoxes kill me. Can someone explain to me please?
Author's note: This post is really a general post... please don't link it to any recent event or put a context to it.